Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Day that Changed Our Lives (Pt 2)

(**In case you missed Part 1, click here!) 

The next five hours were a blur. I had to stop by my parent's house before work, and all I remember is feeling so transparent. I felt like it was so obvious that I had something exciting that I couldn't tell them. Not yet anyway. Not until Brett knew. It was one of my shorter visits at their house...I couldn't stand not being able to say something. I went straight to work then and I believe I put color on people's heads and held scissors in front of their face as I cut their bangs, praying that I could focus for long enough to not mess up. Disclaimer: if you were one of those clients that day, I'm only saying that for dramatic effect, no need to worry ;) I remember being so excited when it was time to dry my clients' hair. It gave me a few minutes to gather my thoughts and think about the fact that I was the only one on earth that knew about this precious life. Such an honor.

On my way home my brain was racing. I knew I only had about 1 1/2 hours until Brett would arrive home, and I had to think of some way to break the news to him. I prayed and prayed and giggled then prayed some more. I knew this baby would make Brett happy. I knew one day this kid would become his/her daddy's world. But I also knew that this was the same Brett who told me just a few weeks ago why he wanted to wait another two years to start trying for a baby. Not because he didn't want one, but just because he loved where we were at at the time. Was he going to be upset? Was he going to think I tricked him into this? Or was he just going to be quiet? I had to deliver the news in a way that would connect with him, in hopes that he would at least admit he was getting more excited in the weeks to come. That's when it hit me. I remember spotting a tiny Notre Dame football onesie at Target earlier that week. It was perfect...something cute and little that would get the message across but something that spoke his language.

Later that evening he pulled in the driveway. I had dinner ready and had already told myself to give him a little bit of time to chill out and unwind before dropping a giant bomb on him that would forever change his life. We ate dinner in the living room and we were talking about our days. About 20 minutes went by and I thought that maybe then would be a good time to go grab his little present. Right then Brett said, "Oh shoot the game's about to start!" and he turned on the tv. Crap. I asked him, "Oh is this a game you're really wanting to watch or do you not really care?" (Stupid question to ask a football fanatic, btw...) He said he wanted to watch it. He turned up the volume and I took our dishes into the kitchen.

"Halftime," I thought. "I'll give him until half time and let him enjoy the next hour of his life B.P. (before pregnancy.) A few minutes into the first quarter, however, Brett went to the kitchen, grabbed some icecream, and started telling me more stories from his day. I tried to listen, but in the back of my mind I was just thinking, "He's not really paying attention to the game. And why am I so worried about changing his life? I had no warning when mine changed this afternoon. He can keep talking. I'm going to grab the gift..."

"Ohh, I got you something today!" I interrupted. I ran back to the room, grabbed the present, and said, "This is it." Deep breath. Whew. Ok, go. "I saw this at Target this afternoon and thought of you," I told him. His face lit up as he said, "Ooo is it 'How I Met Your Mother' Season 7?'"  Oh boy. He opened the gift and pulled out the onesie. He picked it up with his thumb and index finger as if it was diseased. Tears filled up my eyes. "There's more," I said. He looked at the bottom of the bag and found two pregnancy tests and four bold pink lines. He just looked at me with a little confusion and shock. That's when the real water works began. For me, not him. I cried and exclaimed, "I'm sooooo sorry!" in a loud, weepy voice. I'll never forget what he said next...

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